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Overloading children with tutoring and activities: The dangerous trap parents fall into. Oana Zapca: "We often don’t even know why we’re doing it!"
The expert emphasized that many parents underestimate the importance of specialized information in this matter, believing they don't need courses or physical seminars because they think they already know everything about ditching diapers.
"Often, parents believe they don't need much information on this matter because what more can I learn about what ditching diapers entails, and they don't invest in a course or attend a physical seminar. So, one of my recommendations would be to invest in correct information from reliable sources.
Then, strictly referring to household items, still based on studies, it would be ideal to start this training with the potty because it is specially designed for children and comes with more benefits than the toilet bowl. I also clarify, namely, from my experience so far, that I increasingly understand how much it matters to learn to adapt and strictly relate to our child. If my child tends to use the toilet and is more interested because that's what dad does, maybe then we adapt. We don't force him to use the potty, but we invest in a reducer that offers him safety and comfort", said Ruxandra Horvath on Parents Present, a show by ParintisiPitici.ro.
The certified consultant in potty training for children emphasized that introducing the potty too early in the child's life can have unexpected consequences. Horvath explained that when the potty is brought into the family too soon, it is usually found in the playroom or among toys. The child may perceive it as just another toy, and later, when prompted to use the potty for their needs, they won't understand why they should do so there.
"When it comes into the family life too early, it usually sits right in the playroom or among toys, and the child will come to view it just like a toy, and later, when it's suggested to sit on it and do certain things, they won't exactly understand why. If it was a toy until now, what would happen? So, it's best if it doesn't appear so early, not at six months, maybe somewhere after the age of one year and six months, which is the minimum threshold to start training. But, the fact that we bring it into the family life, we buy it, doesn't mean the child should sit on it, should undress, should use it. Things don't unfold that way", Horvath further explained.
The first certified consultant in potty training for children in Romania was asked about methods to encourage a child to sit on the potty. She emphasized that we shouldn't force the child to sit on the potty but rather encourage the initiative to come from him. According to Horvath, the moment when the child will be ready to use the potty will come when he understands certain aspects related to the toileting process cognitively.
"We shouldn't make him sit, but rather let this intention come from him. This will only come when he understands cognitively some things he experiences. What does he experience? Does he understand the role of the potty? Can he distinguish between pee and poop? When will he be ready enough? Will it come naturally for him to sit? If it doesn't come naturally and the parent feels they have to constantly nag the child, it probably means the child is not ready. Ideally, we shouldn't force him", the expert further emphasized.
Ruxandra Horvath was asked about what to do in a situation where the child is scared of the potty. She emphasized the importance of identifying the source of that fear to provide the appropriate solution.
"First of all, let's figure out what caused that scare. There is always a cause. We can't or shouldn't just focus on solving the effects but finding the cause so that we can offer the exact solution.
If they're scared of it because of an unpleasant event, perhaps it would be advisable to set it aside for a month or two and try again later when that fear subsides", Horvath said.
The expert was asked if it's possible to potty train a child on a weekend. She stated that it's achievable, provided the child is adequately prepared for this significant step.
"Yes, it's possible, if the child is well-prepared enough. And here I'm not referring to intensive preparation. The parent shouldn't stay at home with a checklist and tick off each item, trying to meet a set of criteria to determine if the child is ready", clarified Ruxandra Horvath.
Watch the full episode:
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