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The intelligence of children that we need to train. Iuliana Baban: "These are different generations, and it is NO longer enough for them just to write, read, and count!" / PHOTO: freepik.com @dotshock

The expert emphasized the relevance of the approach proposed by Daniel Goleman, writer, psychologist, and science journalist, who focuses on a complex development where social and emotional intelligence play a crucial role in helping new generations adapt to rapid societal changes.

"This approach brought by Daniel Goleman is critical because, nowadays, there is an increasing focus on complex development, where social intelligence and emotional intelligence play an increasingly important role in helping the younger generation adapt.

We are witnessing ever-faster changes in society, and they must make much greater efforts to adapt to these changes than previous generations, our generation, or even the generations before, such as those of our parents and grandparents.

Therefore, they need to have adaptation mechanisms, mechanisms to reorient themselves, to learn on the go, to keep up with increasingly advanced technology, and to update themselves much more frequently than was the case for us. So, this aspect of socio-emotional intelligence is extremely important", said Iuliana Baban on "Părinți Prezenți", a show by ParintisiPitici.ro.

Develop children's intelligence through play! Iuliana Baban: "It’s somewhat natural, but parents can support it through play!"

The importance of socio-emotional intelligence

Iuliana Baban highlighted the importance of socio-emotional intelligence, which, along with interpersonal and intrapersonal intelligence, contributes to personal development and self-awareness.

"We can add interpersonal intelligence, which is somewhat connected to this area of socialization, or intrapersonal intelligence, personal development, and self-awareness, where we can connect with the area of emotional intelligence.

That is, to become very aware of my emotions, to manage them, to use them to my advantage in stressful situations, in situations of discomfort, in tense situations. Otherwise, we face episodes of blockage, with maladaptive mechanisms that we do not want", the expert added.

Iuliana Baban: "What good are all those skills if they can't manage in a social environment?"

Psychopedagogue and speech therapist Iuliana Baban emphasized the importance of balancing cognitive and social development in children's education. She pointed out the tendency of some parents to focus excessively on developing their children's cognitive skills, such as reading, writing, and solving complex problems, at the expense of essential social skills.

"It’s good to stimulate these qualities, not just the cognitive, rational side—solving problems, reading very early, writing very early, doing sophisticated arithmetic. Yes, okay, these are useful; it’s important to consider them, but we shouldn't stop there", stated Iuliana Baban.

The expert frequently observed situations where parents boast about their children's cognitive achievements, but those children struggle in other areas.

"I encounter situations where the parent says, ‘Oh, but my child knows...’ and then the parent starts listing a bunch of cognitive accomplishments. On the other hand, that child has difficulties making friends, waiting their turn when there are multiple participants, and negotiating in a team during group activities. So, what good are all those skills if they can't manage in a social environment?

These social skills are important and need to be trained. They are learned in the same way as any other aspect of our lives. Just as they learn to write, read, and calculate in the rational-cognitive area, they can also practice other aspects like negotiating, waiting their turn, building resilience to frustration when they lose, being a good teammate or athlete, and reacting appropriately both when they win and when they lose", added Iuliana Baban.

Iuliana Baban: "These things happen only through exposure, meaning practice, exercise, play"

Iuliana Baban emphasized the importance of practice and direct experience in developing children's emotional and social skills. She pointed out that simply teaching theory is not enough to help children learn how to handle real-life situations.

"These things happen only through exposure, meaning practice, exercise, play. We can’t just give a lesson, explain it, and lecture them about it. Yes, okay, we might have a small discussion, but not in a way that makes them learn it like a poem.

This happens often with many children. When I ask them how they should handle a certain situation, in theory, they know the correct answer very well, but then they have this moment of honesty and admit that they struggle to put into practice what they explained to me in theory.

The classic example, since we were talking about emotions, is volcanic anger. Okay, what do we do? 'Well, we take a deep breath, count to 10.' Great, correct answer! Do you manage to do this? 'Not really'”, said Iuliana Baban.

Loredana Iriciuc pointed out that adults face the same difficulties in applying emotional management techniques: "Iuliana, even we, adults, often struggle with this."

Iuliana Baban confirmed this, explaining that personal development is a continuous process: "Exactly, yes! Because, as I tell the children, everything related to personal development is a never-ending journey. We are constantly learning something new; we constantly face challenges, and in new situations, we need to learn new mechanisms to adapt and function as best as possible, to meet current challenges."

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